Hold the steam, please

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Ladies, I was going to write a post about how Gwyneth wants us all to steam clean our “uterus et al”, but then the Royalist, of all people, said it so much better than I could.

Bear in mind, GP is the same woman who swears by colonics, fasts, and juice cleanses, which says to me that she regularly terrorizes her body in a variety of horrifying ways. It’s actually possible that her shit don’t stink.

Instead, read this — Your Vagina is Not Cussing: Good, Simply Vulvovaginal Hygiene Tips — and learn from it. I would say that all these tips are common sense, but since there are women out there using loofahs on their lady gardens (ouch), then perhaps common sense is not as common as one would hope.

Feel free to share more advice and helpful links with the crowd.

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11 Responses to Hold the steam, please

  1. Loth says:

    Given I don’t even iron clothes (ANY clothes) I think it is fair to say I was never going to be tempted to this. I think GP needs a hobby or 6.

  2. Cassi says:

    Oh my -that Royalist article was hilarious! How are there people who can combine wealthy and stupidity as well as GP? Really, they should be mutually exclusive.

  3. the "other" Alison in Ottawa says:

    This line wins the internet for me today, “It is an energetic release—not just a steam douche”…..what the what?????

  4. A friend who is, shall we say, all about the mystical Yoni, shared the hoo-ha steaming article on Facebook and immediately underneath it (in the very helpful way we so appreciate) was a link to a recipe for Steamed Clams. Close, but no cigar, Zuckerberg.

  5. Smalltown Me says:

    I’m a little confused as to how the steam is actually going to reach the uterus, since a gynecologist needs a speculum and other tools to get in there.

  6. GP seems to be confused about women’s anatomy in general (see Smalltown Me’s comment, above) and definitely not someone I’d listen to for medical advice.
    After reading all of the links, I’m proud to say that my mama taught me well.

  7. That chopsticks at an ice cream parlor line was priceless.
    Good grief, is there no nonsense people in California will NOT engage in? Raging idiots-and GP has become the queen. Did you ever think she’d become a bigger joke than someone like Paris Hilton? And yet…
    Way to spin idiocy in to a pubic service announcement, Jen. I appreciate the education.

  8. Please do not confuse Hollywood with California.

  9. Patience says:

    I would really like to see the science behind GP’s claim that the steam somehow balances one’s hormones. WUT?

  10. Julie says:

    what Susan said! Hollyweird is it’s own continent here in Californye-AAAA!!! lol. I did live in So Cal for my growing up years, and they do tend to try and find stuff to do down there. heh. Mugwort steam up my hoo-ha, tho? NO. As Smalltown Me above pointed out, not much going up there without a speculum. I recently discovered other interesting items on goop, from another bloggers suggestion, and I find it interesting, and laughable, what a combination!

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